How Evil He Must Be
by CrazyIndigoChild
Summary: After having survived and re-cooperated, Shen realizes that his life in China is over. So he decides to flee the country. One problem: how is he going to get Crane to leave the Furious Five so they can truly be together? Slash.


"You shouldn't be here." Soft sounds of descent into the nearby peach tree. In the light of the moon, the dying petals of withering blossoms strain to hold on to the bare branches. Tall and slim was the master who hid so shamefully in the denser canopy; his dark, beady bird eyes watching me curiously from the shadows.

His voice is like floating lanterns; so very light and whimsical that one couldn't help but cling to every tumble and dip as it lifts into the air. Inside lay a steel structure powered by the fire burning deep within him. That's why every moment I spend with him is a secret celebration: he's the New Year that brings on my resolution to do better: to _be_ better. For his sake. Though, of course, I would never dare tip him off to my infatuation. I am, after all, a bad guy; and bad guys don't entertain such ideals of love.

I peer over the edge of the rocky cliff, scanning the eery fog as it rolls over the hidden villages and valleys this temple oversees. Just over my crooked beak I can see the distant glow of blue as day encroaches. Maybe I should have come earlier.

Respecting his need for secrecy I do not turn to face him. I wonder why because he specifically chose Oogway's resting place so that neither the rest of the Five nor that disgusting swine Po would discover us. "I know," I sneer, tucking my feathers into my robe against his coldness. I feel the eager handle of my sword, but I shan't need it. Crane is safe. "I just need to speak to you is all."

He moves. Trots along the branch to follow my gaze out over the valley. He scratches at the branch with his talon before a soft, shaky, "What's bothering you, love?" drifts over to me.

"Come here." My voice is sharper than I want it, but I need him to listen. The twitch of a frayed straw hat before he takes flight with the soft, flapping of delicate white feathers against the thick, unnaturally warm night. I can feel the air ruffle my feathers as he lands with a final beat of his wings. His scent is overpowering, but I won't allow myself the pleasure of reeling. So my heart swoons and shudders recklessly with each wave of heat from his body. He stands so close I could kill him before he could realize what was happening...

Strong, skilled wings ghost over my robe before I find myself enveloped, his one arm nudging at my cheek to face him. Ever the silent one, he waits for me to continue with searching eyes glinted with worry. Quietly, delicately, I nuzzle into his chest. It feels so refreshingly unfamiliar to be so... docile.

Smoky incense from the temple is imbedded in the layers of feathers and soft down. His supper of noodles and dumplings faint on his breath. I sigh.

"I'm leaving China." He recoils, his wing on my shoulder slipping back to his side. I feel a small shiver from the damp, but the look on his face makes me feel as if I had been slapped.

"You're-why? Did... did someone recognize you or-?"

I roll my eyes. He just doesn't understand, and his ignorance bothers me. "It's not easy being _dead_, Crane!" His face falls with a soft 'Oh.'

How do I explain to him that he's become the centre of my universe? How I can't possibly go near any villagers for fear of being discovered. Not to mention that the Dragon Warrior would have to come bring me to justice... he and the fearless, Furious Five.

For months now my existence relies on him meeting my needs, I am utterly dependent on this bird for survival. So much so that it's driven me mad! No matter how much I feel for him... I can't let him stay as close as he has been as of late. I've domesticated myself to his feeding hand. And there are rules about biting the hand that feeds; which might have to come around to us.

His quiet, level voice breaks my thoughts. "Where are you going to go?" How do I say 'Anywhere but in this unforgiving Hell' without hurting him?

I can't.

So I won't.

I say, "India." And I needn't say more. His head bows low as he tries to entertain his much-controlled emotions with the gold vines on his legs.

"If... If that's what you want-"

Smiling, I cut him off. "I wish for you to come with me."

He frowns and looks as though he's seriously considering following me out. There's so much thought and deliberate consideration in his eyes I can't help but stare eagerly. In the distance there's a chime that rings to welcome the new day.

"I can't, Shen. You know I can't leave the Five. They need me." I nod. Of course he can't leave; I hadn't expected any less than his loyalty.

"If that's what you want," I say. It's rather irrational since I am the one leaving him, but I can't help but feel a stab of abandonment. The only comfort I take is in knowing he's feeling the same... only much, much worse.

Crane sighs, "It's... not what I... That's not what I want." Tongue thick and heavy, his words came out mumbled and shy. "I...I love you and... And I want to see where this goes." His voice tapered to an incoherent jumble, but I heard it clear as day. It's an honest bid... but it's awkward and rushed, and he knows it.

It surprises me a little because I'm not expecting him to be so bold, especially after I've revealed my plans to leave the country. I want to call him out on it. But I don't want to be stuck with the expectation to say it back because I don't know if I could.

Do I love Crane? Of course I do... But then why am I leaving him without a second thought? Am I so quick to leave everyone who has ever loved me to avoid the pain of loving them back? I loved my parents; now look where that's gotten me.

He's watching me. That's my cue. "And I do you," I reply with at least some authenticity. It not enough for him though it's the most I can give considering I'm not looking to stay by his side for much longer. How evil I must be to destroy the one thing in my life to bring me happiness. He ducks his face under the rim of his straw hat: ashamed.

"But we can't live like this." I've realized the sun has come up a lot faster than I had anticipated. How long have we been standing here? Too long I realize when the temple gong drones out lowly from the hill behind us. Instinctively Crane snaps towards the sound and I can see his innards flinch; eager to serve and quick to fall to obedience.

Without thinking I throw myself at him, clutching to his wiry frame for the last time before his job steals our last moments together. "Goodbye," I murmur into his soft neck, nuzzling the feathers there. In one wonderfully swift motion his strong wings envelop me again. An affectionate peck at his neck before breaking the veil of grey-tipped heaven and launching my flightless body off the cliff into the mist below.

A final shrill caw of goodbye before my wings catch the thick air and I'm gliding. Cutting through the fog like the faint but clear cry of a pained farewell behind me. It's a sound that I know will haunt me until the day I die. But maybe if I can chase off the blinding tears by the time the sun reaches over the distant mountains keeping me from my salvation, I can forget I love him enough to make it over the border.


End file.
